Super Bowl ads 2012 - A Trunchpolian critique

Possibly the biggest regret of my life was suggesting to Pete Rozelle over lunch back in 1966 that it might be a fun idea for the winners of the two competing American Football leagues, (the AFL and the NFL) to play a one off friendly game I affectionately called the “Super Bowl” (a rather cryptic reference to the rather delicious bowl of lobster bisque I was enjoying at the time).

Had I known that that innocuous little suggestion would lead to the multibillion dollar retinal assault that is the modern day Super Bowl, I would of course have kept my trap shut and simply finished my bisque in silence.

Well, sadly I cannot rewind time and undo my grievous mistake, so instead I will give a biting critique of the pick of this years most talked about Super Bowl advertisements.

Coca-Cola:

How they got these two polar bears to act in front of camera is beyond me! I can only presume that the bear’s must have been raised in captivity and trained by the finest acting coaches from a very tender age indeed. Aside from the acting, which was wonderful, the advertisement itself left a lot to be desired. My advice to Coca-Cola? If you have the world’s finest polar bear actors at your disposal, put them to good use!


Hyundai Cheetah:

To release an advert almost perfectly recreating the circumstances surrounding the gruesome death of my good friend Nathaniel Epstein on the set of a 1961 Cheetah Spark Plugs commercial is insensitive in the extreme!

Volkswagen:

More acting animals, wonderful! Unfortunately the advert itself makes no sense at all.

Toyota camry

I think I just vomited all over my new Church’s leather brogues.

Chevrolet:

I had no idea Clint Eastwood was running for President this year. What a splendid way to launch his campaign! Clint, if I hadn’t have had my US dual citizenship revoked in 1972 you would have almost certainly been able to count on my vote.


HULU:

Brilliant!! Hilarious!! I don’t get it.

Pepsi:

Oh dear.

Trunchpole Awards 2011 - call for entries

Back in the 1950's, long before The Clio's or the One Show was even conceived of, the only award worth winning was a Trunchpole Award (or Trunchy, as they were affectionately known).

I created the Trunchies with one thing, and one thing only, in mind: to recognise the very best in creative excellence across the world. Needless to say, for the 11 years that the Trunchies ran all but 3 of the awards given out went to my agency, Trunchpole & Trunchpole.


Well, It gives me a great deal of pleasure to announce that the Trunchies are back! And this time I promise not to enter myself.

As of today I will be accepting entries in the following categories.

1. Film (paid for media)
2. Film (unpaid for media)
3. Press
4. Poster/Outdoor
5. Radio
5. Digital (websites and the like)
6. Social Media
7. Miscellaneous

Please email all submissions (pdf's, links, jpegs, whatever you see fit) to corneliustrunchpole@yahoo.com

The deadline for submissions will be the 15th of May 2011.

Good luck!

Cornelius

Man of the year 1942

Many thanks to Emma Hirst at Advertising Age for digging up this gem from their archives. Sadly, on account of a particularly unbalanced critique of one of my Colgate commercials, I sent the accolade back barely 6 months after receiving it.

T&T Partnerships

The next (and most exciting) phase of T&T’s return to glory will involve the forming of strategic partnerships with a select number of the world’s finest and most progressive agencies. Agencies with a social conscience. Agencies with an appetite to do something, how should I say……..a little different.

If you happen to work at such an agency, and have the authority to sanction such an exciting partnership, do please get in touch with me at corneliustrunchpole@yahoo.com for more details.

Huzzah!

T&T recruitment – phase II

In my quest to attract the finest, most exciting and agile minds in the advertising world to T&T, I am now embarking upon a fresh wave of recruitment. If you would like to be a part of Trunchpole & Trunchpole, please send an example of the single piece of work or idea you are most proud of to corneliustrunchpole@yahoo.com

(I care not if this piece ran, was merely speculative or was not even an advertising idea at all! Indeed, as far as I am concerned it can be scribbled on the back of a beer mat!)

Alternatively, just write to me explaining why you would like to be a part of the most exciting new agency the industry has ever seen.

I am particularly keen on hearing from the younger and hungrier amongst you. Especially those still in college or striving for their first significant break.

Thank you.

Back online!

You may have noticed that Cornelius' Corner has been a tad quiet of late. Well, rather embarrassingly the reason behind this is that, to put it simply, I completely forgot my password for the account.

Now, this may seem like an easy enough thing to do for someone of my age, but, for a man who twice won "Schoolboy Memory of the Year" at prep school, and whose recall skills made him a key member of British Army's "Nazi Spy Facial Recognition Team", I have found this development in my mental well being most alarming. So much so in fact that I have visited my doctor and requested a series of most intrusive physical examinations. CAT scans, CT scans (which apparently do not stand for Cornelius Trunchpole), X-Rays and, just to be on the safe side, a colonoscopy to boot.

If I do indeed receive the dreaded diagnosis of Alzheimer's, I will of course dedicate the rest of my life to finding a cure.

Trunchpole: the interview!

Here it is. Part 1 of my first radio interview in almost 50 years. And what a revealing portrait it is too.

http://theradioshow.soundlounge.com/


P.S. I believe once you click on the interview it will download and then play in your itune. Somehow.

Habitat For Humanity - IMPORTANT

Those of you thinking about the Habitat For Humanity brief please remember to think BIG. Yes, HFH does indeed have some very specific goals (which are listed below) but it is our job to deliver them something far bigger and better than they could ever have dreamed of.

What I want is ideas that will generate such interest in this charity that it raises literally millions of pounds for them. They deserve nothing less.

T&T is in the business of amazing its clients, not merely satisfying them.

Thank you.

Habitat For Humanity - brief details

Hello

Yesterday I received an email from our wonderful new client, Brian Simms, at Habitat For Humanity. In it he kindly asked me to pass on to the good people of T&T some specifics for the brief.

Here is what he said


Dear Sir


Here are some areas we need marketing help in - in case any of your folks were looking for direction:

1. Ads & an Ad campaign advice for our fundraising efforts on Rehab'ing an old house on Steffens street in Sierra Vista, AZ. We are $66,000 away from reaching our goal of $88,000 to complete the rehab. The house is an old home with single pane windows and no insulation - we will rip it down to the sticks and rebuild it green! The Steffens house will include solar electric panels and solar hot water heater.

2. Logo and an Ad Campaign (low or no cost) for our "Hammer 4 a Home" Barter campaign - where we trade on craigslist starting with an old yellow handled hammer - trade up, and up, and up until we can trade for a buildable lot and building supplies.

3. Ad campaign (low or no cost) to get folks to donate their Frequent Flyer Miles to our Habitat Affiliate.

Notes:
- Habitat for Humanity Logo's cannot be altered or used in logo development (Logo use guidelines document is available on request).
- Tombstone, AZ is nearby and in our area of operations
- The Hammer donated for the Hammer 4 Home is yellow handled - we plan on re-using the hammer next year (or every other year) to do this campaign again (if successful)
- We have not yet setup an account to be able to accept Frequent Flyer Miles - but we are researching it and have found a couple web sites that might work! (available on request)
- Any question please contact me!

Cheers,
Brian Simms, Construction Chair, Habitat for Humanity Sierra Vista Area, Southern AZ

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Sierra-Vista-Habitat-for-Humanity/141576312541836

T&T Pro Bono competition - the results!

Following a veritable avalanche of entries, it gives me great pleasure to announce that the winner of the inaugural Trunchpole & Trunchpole pro bono competition, is none other than Arizona chapter of Habitat For Humanity, a marvelous charity whose mission is to provide low cost homes for the disadvantaged. (As a man who is somewhat homeless himself at the present moment, I can tell you this struck a real chord).

I must now call on you, the creative geniuses that make up the global Trunchpole creative community, to donate just a few minutes of your time to pondering how a creative idea (of any medium) could better help the good people of Habitat for Humanity achieve their noble goals.

The brief is really that simple.

All the information you need can be found here.

http://habitatsv.org/default.aspx
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Sierra-Vista-Habitat-for-Humanity/141576312541836?ref=mf

Any questions, you know where to find me.

I look forward to receiving all your wonderful ideas.

Huzzah!

P.S. To those of you who entered yet did not win, fear not. Many of you impressed me greatly and I have decided that T&T will indeed get to you in turn.

T&T Competition

Ask any of my friends what single word they would use to describe me, and I have no doubt that they would all answer the same: "generous".(or possibly selfless, it's a toss-up really).

And it is with this trademark generosity that I announce a most exciting initiative.

You see, to celebrate the forthcoming relaunch of my beloved agency, I have decided to offer one lucky brand an entire T&T developed advertising campaign completely gratis. No agency fee whatsoever . All you would have to pay for is media and a small amount for production.

So, if you feel your brand, product, company or charity could do with some Trunchpole magic, regardless of how big or small it may be, please write to me at corneliustrunchpole@yahoo.com, explaining your needs. From all the entries I will then select the worthiest winner.

Good luck!!

Cornelius

T&T University

As you are all aware, T&T will be an agency whose creative department will be most unconventional. Though directed and guided by my trusty board, it will be a department of unlimited creative minds from around the world, all contributing remotely.

Clearly T&T's success will therefore rely on a great degree of participation from passionate, eager, motivated, creative minds. Traits, I find, are notoriously associated with the young.

It strikes me then that T&T would be wise to make an attempt to form partnerships with as many advertising colleges, courses and universities as it can. Perhaps even going so far as to encourage colleges to include working on live T&T open briefs as part of their syllabus. Just think how wonderful it would be as a student to get the opportunity to see your work actually get made. And to get paid for it too!

This involvement at college level would ensure that T&T is automatically ingrained into the psyche of the next generation of advertising greats. It would also allow T&T to benefit from their young, fertile and digitally literate minds.

Anyway, as always I would be delighted to hear any thoughts or suggestions any of you may have on this matter.

Trunchpole the Movie!

It would appear that my return to the world of advertising has not gone unnoticed. You see, the good people at HBO (or is it NBC? I’m not sure. Anyway, I digress…) have taken it upon themselves to make a documentary about my life and advertising career.

(I suspect it is something of an attempt to set the record straight after my scandalous omission from that diabolical piece of celluloid Art & Copy).

Anyway, I have been informed that the documentary will feature a wide array of archive material as well as countless interviews with eminent advertising luminaries from my past, present and future. It is set to be a star studded affair.

As production of the film progresses, I will of course keep you all well informed.

Exciting news, I’m sure you’ll agree.

The Official T&T Logo!

It gives me unimaginable pleasure to finally unveil to the world the official Trunchpole & Trunchpole logo. And what a splendid logo it is too!

The eagle eyed amongst you will spot that it is not one of the official 4 finalists I published last month. This is because of a last minute entry from a fascinatingly mysterious boutique agency that goes by the name Lovechild (yourlovechild.com).

The even more eagle eyed amongst you will spot that the little fellow sitting atop the logo is a kilt clad Scottish Barnacle Goose, one of the few native geese of scotland and one of my favourite species of animal.

Another major milestone in the resurgence of the Trunchpole legend.

Huzzah!

T&T senior appointments

After much thought, soul searching and whisky I have decided which individuals I would like standing directly behind me in the T&T enterprise. These people, who have been chosen for their creative excellence, will be my eyes and my ears, my men on the ground, my Johnny’s on the spot, if you will. They will be the foot soldiers of everything Trunchpole, and I will expect much from them. In return they will be showered with the glory and prestige that naturally comes with their posts.

If you are one of them, congratulations.
If you are not, there is always time.


Founder: Cornelius Trunchpole
Chairman: Cornelius Trunchpole
Executive Creative Director: Cornelius Trunchpole

Creative heads:

Susan Credle
Chris Beresford-Hill
Seth Fried
Amir Farhang
Ben Walker

Partners:

Megan Sheehan
Kevin Butler
Carlos Wigle
Alerbto French
Marco Cignini
Trevor bittinger
Brian Novoa
Branden Kramer
JD Beebe
Aiden Bordner
Erhan Ali Yilmaz
Julianna Cobb
John Mucha
Adam Kornblum

Ben Nevis brief

A cracking idea from Alberto French.

In Alberto's words:

Nevis Whiskey: It's too good for you.

Nevis Whiskey is liquid manna squeezed from the teat of angels. An intriguing blend full of interesting smells and notes. Beautiful organics. A playfulness of sweet and sour. It is precious. In fact there are only two lakes good enough to provide the water for this whiskey. This is not a mass produced. Nevis employs very strict quality controls on their whiskey. And these quality controls extend to our customers as well. Not to be cruel, but it is most likely too good for you. Mr. and Mrs. John Q Public.

Like the most respectable Scottish schools, Jordanhill, Williasmwood and Cults, Nevis Whiskey, the most respectable of whiskeys, requires only the most respectable of people.

So, if you want a bottle of Ben Nevis you will have to apply for one. Before a bottle of the world’s most respected whiskey is bestowed Nevis will need to know your qualifications. They want to know that you’re up to snuff, that you’ll have the proper appreciation for the product.

T&T's first open brief!

Living for 40 years in the shadow of Ben Nevis, I became more than a little familiar with the Ben Nevis distillery, the oldest in Scotland. Through years of patronage (I’ve always been partial to a distillery tour) I developed a love of both the Ben Nevis single malt, and the people who produce it (my housekeeper Winona even uses it to make a most spectacular "flaming spotted dick").

However, outside of the small town of Fort William, not a soul has heard of it. Which is where you, the people of Trunchpole & Trunchpole come in.

On the 18th of June I will be paying Ben Nevis a visit to talk them through how T&T will turn them into the most respected whisky in the world.

All I need now is your ideas.

And remember, think big.

www.bennevisdistillery.com

P.S. individuals who excel on this brief will be considered for starring roles in the agency.

T&T logo finalists.

I've pored over the countless logo designs I've been sent and have selected the final four candidates. As T&T is a democracy (of sorts) I will now put these designs to you, my future employees, to pick a winner.

And may I quickly say thank you once again to everyone who submitted a design. It proves the people of T&T are indeed the most creative on the planet.

P.S. A special award goes to the wonderful Megan Sheehan for her ingenious "Corny knows" T-shirt design. If you'd like to order one, best speak to Megan (T-shirt production and distribution is not my forte).

I’ve bought a new suit!

Despite my continued internment at a US immigration centre, I took the time last week to instruct my tailor, Henry Poole & Co. of Savile Row, to cut me a brand new white linen suit for the summer. The thought of hotfooting round New York in it, light as a feather, is pretty much the only thing keeping me going right now.

Trunchpole, the cartoon!

I've always subscribed to the theory that until you have been depicted in a cartoon, you cannot consider yourself truly successful. Well, thanks to the genius Kevin Butler I can now die a happy man.

And thank you for making me look so thin!

Keep them coming dear boy!